(via cassadeescollarbones)
- Me: How do you find Will Smith in the snow?
- Mom: He's black
- Me:
- Mom:
- Me:
- Mom:
- Me: You look for fresh prints, but oh my God
plot twist i never met your mother you were adopted now go to bed
(via eastc0astblazin)
imagine if it went the opposite way around
- Me: Hi! Can you sign my pap-
- Band Member: Marry me.
- Me: What?
- Band Member: What?
- Me:
- Band Member:
- Me:
- Band Member: I mean yeah, sure I'll sign your paper.
what if there was a really flamboyant assassin and after they killed someone they just snapped their fingers, turned away and said ‘you’ve just been SASSassinated’
(Source: frickingloki, via eastc0astblazin)
for those not in the know, night witches were russian lady bombers who bombed the shit out of german lines in WW2. Thing is though, they had the oldest, noisiest, crappest planes in the entire world. The engines used to conk out halfway through their missions, so they had to climb out on the wings mid flight to restart the props. the planes were also so noisy that to stop germans from hearing them combing and starting up their anti aircraft guns, they’d climb up to a certain height, coast down to german positions, drop their bombs, restart their engines in midair, and get the fuck out of dodge.
their leader flew over 200 missions and was never captured.
how the fuck is this not taught in every single history class ever
TOO FUCKING BADASS FOR YOU
(Source: sovietico)
i will never forgive jamie lynn spears for getting pregnant and ruining zoey 101
(via eastc0astblazin)
